Drunken Slurring Dwarf sings 'Cutie Patootie'

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Hard to top the title, huh, 'cause they call her "Cutie.  Cutie Patootie."


-- Of course they do!


 They say she's a little southern girl but she's not snooty.







Here are what I think the lyrics are to this:


"Cutie Patootie" Lyrics by Eden Wood:

 "They call me cutie cutie patootie rockin out the pageant stage and shakin my bootey cutie cutie patootie I'm a little southern girl but no I'm not snooty, you see my face in magazines papers and the tv screens, 
CNN GMA got my own facebook page pretty hair pretty eyes glitzy dress grand prize books dolls tv deals Donald trump keep it real......
.... cause I'm a cutie cutie patootie eden wood the showgirl appearing in movies sweetie sweetie pateetie lovin the attention but no I'm not needy, 
thank you shirly temple for pavin the way I got my start in pageants but I'm here to stay they say that little pageant girls are flyin by night, 
but it seems like oprah winfrys doin alright :-) cause I'm a cutie cutie patootie a squeezey squeezey bon cheesey a smoochie smooch you on gucci a snuggles 'n' guggles 
Yeah!"


First of all, gosh, where to start?  


What's "Squeezey bon Cheezey?" It sounds like a character from a Sid and Marty Krofft show.  


And "Guggles?  What are "Guggles?" I'm very confused by this.


And her ditty also suggests that Oprah was a "pageant girl?"  Maybe that's true, I don't know.  But, Really?  Wow.
But, uh, most of all, this kid's real name is really "Eden Wood?"  Come on.  Really???  Here's a link to someone who has a problem with this.

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