New rule: If it says it's "Back-to-school-time," then it has to act like it.

Note to Higher Being:

-- Hello? Anyone there? I think you left the heat on.

It's "Fall," remember? That means, you know, "Back-to-school."

Time for apples and knee socks and crisp new outfits, and not a collective cast call for Lawrence-of-Arabia, Pt. II. Come on.

We've been buying pencils and composition books, so synch with the collective calendar, here, and knock off the "summer" act. We're over it.

So, sorry, to complain, but surf is not up. It's September.

And now for something completely different.